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theipaper.com

Thursday March 19 2026

By Eleanor Peake

Senior Features Writer and author of Life Lessons

Good afternoon,

On Monday, I visited a pretty commune in rural Suffolk. Naomi gave me a tour, and was quick to tell me this sprawling stately home (a former nunnery), with a farm of cows and sheep, a 20-person sauna, and an empty chapel for parties, is not a utopia. This is simply a community that cooks together, eats together, cares for each other, chops wood and harvests the land together. I feel as if I have stepped into an alternate reality.

There are 60 people living in this huge village-like estate, with ages ranging from three to 93. The community supports an elderly resident struggling with dementia; tasks are communal which means meals are cooked together every night, and so he is often supervised. He needn’t go to a care home when he has 60 people on hand to support him.

It was lunch time, and so I sat down with a hot bowl of dahl in the garden and spoke to members. They are financiers, teachers and ecologists. Many have children and delight in how childcare is spread out amongst the parents. One member told me she joined at 26 after having her first baby. Thanks to the extra support around food and basic needs, she had much more time and even joined a rock band. The modern constraints and isolation of young motherhood suddenly disappeared and she was around dozens of other families sharing the burden with her.

Living with 60 people has its downsides. Naomi told me you need a degree of resilience and flexibility when managing other people’s wants and needs, as well as your family’s, and others told how you lose control over the banal things human beings love, such as your favourite mug or your usual seat. You also have to ask permission if you want a guest to stay for a period of time, which I’m sure can become grating. But you don’t lose routine. Lunch is at 12.30pm during the week, and 1pm at the weekend. Dinner is served at 6.30pm every day. 

After half a day at the commune, I’d argue you win more than you lose. I was totally won over by this place. I can see how life-changing it would be for families and older people who need extra care – how models like this could help tackle some of our biggest social problems, from the loneliness epidemic to falling birth rates. It was founded by the hippies in the 60s, but this sort of alternative living is becoming increasingly more relevant as prices rise and social media makes us even more isolated and polarised in our boxed-off terrace houses. Perhaps the secret to happiness isn’t a better job or a longer holiday; it’s shared meals, shared living and shared purpose.

This week we’re looking at… housing.

Surveyor David Prince warns people are being overcharged by rogue companies for unnecessary mould treatment (Photo: Teri Pengilley)

💦I spent a day with a damp expert – and learned easy, cheap ways to keep my home dry. One in four people in the UK is living with mould and dampness. It’s getting worse thanks to climate change and high energy bills – but don’t get ripped off. Read more

🏠I have £200,000 in savings but I’m not buying a house – this is my plan. A growing number of people are turning away from property as an aspirational investment, and are banking on making their money work harder elsewhere. Read more

🔨Kevin McCloud: My golden rules for renovation, and the things you should never do. Just because you once project-managed an IT plan for your business doesn’t mean you can project-manage the building of a house, says the Grand Designs renovation guru. Read more

Five signs of a strong immune system according to experts – and how to boost it →

Nine easy ways to make your teeth look better in a month, according to dentists →

I stopped hiring graduates years ago – people in their 40s work faster and harder →

My parents think I’m stupid to go travelling in my 30s – are they right? →

My charming, funny father was my hero – then he tore our family apart →

Four signs a friend is bad for you – and how to cut ties in a healthy way →

Click on the poll below to vote.

Last week I asked if you are a micromanager at home. You were fairly split – 50 per cent said yes, 38 per cent said no, and 12 per cent were undecided.

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Author: East London